have partaken of that therapy before ;)

Good friends want to protect eachother, it's natural.

Real love, the kind that stands the test of time and tribulations doesn't make you feel bad.

I'm sorry you are hurting. Locking away your heart to protect it won't work...without attention it will just shrivel up and become unusable. It's the act of taking a risk, even knowing that your heart could be smashed to smithereens, and entrusting it to someone that makes it beat stronger.

*raises her hand and clears her throat*

AV, I won't repeat anything these very wise posters have written. Just know that LAW is right on the money, and that, as dark as things might seem right now, have faith...you might be surprised at what happens from here. I know I was, and that I like the me I am now a helluva lot better now than the me of six months ago. And, as shocked as *I've* been, I know there are many Pixies out there who can attest my turnaround. Just when you think there's no hope, a ray of light might come peeking through the clouds when you least expect it.

Every person who comes into our lives, no matter how brief the contact or deep the relationship, changes us and makes us the person we become in the future. Most often, those changes are for the better. Give it time...take it day by day, or take it minute by minute if you need to. What's meant to happen will happen.

^^^^These are words I live by and can attest to! Doesn't help the pain, but at least they give a reason as to why things happen when they do! Only time heals the pain.... :hug:

Well Welcome to Pixies qwerty, glad you decided to have your first post help a pixie in need.

I just would like to say a few things to defend myself. AV and I have a very close relationship and I am not trying to hurt her. At the begining of the post I told her to remember that her and him had problems so that this guy doesn't become her sun and earth. It happened to me, I started thinking I couldn't live without this guy, it's like I blocked out all the bad. I wanted to remind AV that there were troubled times and that she can stand without him she did before he was around. I also told her at the end that if the above advice was not to her liking she still needed to step back and look at the overall picture to see how she really felt about the situation. I will be the first to admit, I am still trying to figure out all the reasons of why they broke up. At times they fit together well, maybe more times than not, what matters is that I love her and if she is hurting I will do whatever it takes to take the hurt away.

The only thing that really matters is that we will be friends no matter what, she knows that I may come off harsh but I mean well. I love her and always have. A boy can not seperate us forever, thankfully.

If he hates me... So be it... I don't want to see her hurt any further... He is not my priority, She is.

I would like to say that I am not normally this harsh but when it comes to my AV, I will be. I don't mean this to be an attack on you, since you are a new member, again I welcome you to the pixie family. I just wanted you to know that AV and I have a personal relationship, more than just meeting on this board.

Kaelynn:
Firstly, just because I have posted only once doesn't mean I'm new to the boards.

Secondly... that's about all i can say to you without taking focus off the topic at hand for the time being.

AV:
Follow your heart. When things feel they are at the worst what is there to lose by trying?

Worst case scenario you never get back together. Don't let the relationship you say was the best you've had make you give up on all relationships.

Let me put it this way... It took you how many relationships to find this guy? Was all the previous heartbreak worth the time you had with him? If so, why isn't the chance for a little more heartbreak worth the chance of finding someone even better than him?

[QUOTE=qwerty]Kaelynn:
Firstly, just because I have posted only once doesn't mean I'm new to the boards.

[QUOTE]

Welcome as well. If you don't mind me asking, how long have you been trolling on the boards? Just curious as to why you didn't post before now, that's all. I know the first time I saw anything I was hooked.

LAW

P.S. AV I hope today was a little better than yesterday.

Qwerty I think on this topic we can agree to disagree. I love her and that is all that matters.

AV I will call you later tonight so we can talk. You have always given me the best advice, sorry I don't always listen to you. I don't regret the mistakes I have made, we all need to live and learn. Just know that I will always support your decisions and I will always be standing behind you supporting and defending. Qwerty is right don't just focus on the bad, focus on everything, analyse how you feel, have felt, and decide what makes you happy and why. That is what you need to do.

You will make the best decision you always do, you are a much better person than I am and you always will be. More moral, impartial, and loving than I could ever be.

I will talk to you later!
~K~

I just posted a long post here but to be honest sometimes the best advice you can give someone with a broken heart especially when you don't really know them is to simply say I am sorry and mean it genuinely. I am sorry you find yourself in this situation. I dont know you well enough to give advice and so will simply wish you better times ahead with easier decisions....

Most of all I wish you gentler warmer days ahead. Days filled at least with loving friends and family around you. Days where you are able to see the beauty and positive qualities you as a person have and can be ready for hopefuly the right person in your life. Good luck with your healing process and sincere hugs here for you.

/bow

Zeph

AV- I am so sorry honey, to hear about your situation. I know how horrible a heartache can be, and I'm sorry you're having to endure it now.

I can't give you any advice but I can share a tiny bit of experience with you. I've lived for 49 years and had my share of hurts, disappointments, bullshit. There were times that I felt sure I wouldn't be able to handle it, didn't have the inner resources, the well was just too empty...

But I can honestly say that at some later point, I was able to look back at that hurtful experience and see that I was better off now for not being in the same boat I was in at the time... make sense? I know it sounds like a load of crap to you right now, it would to me too... but please hang in there and one of these days you'll see what I mean.

Also... AV? I agree that if you feel this man is "it", what have you got to lose by squaring your shoulders and laying your cards on the table? If it's worth having, it's worth fighting damn hard for!


((((AV))))

I don't know you very well AV - but we all have at one time or another been through what you are right now. Know that we are there for you and that you have loads of friends here you can talk with. I hesitated posting a reply for this thread only because we don't know each other - but felt compelled today to let you know you are in our thoughts.

Hey girlfriend, where you at? havn't heard from you in a couple days


Speak up and let us know how you are doing.

We care about you!!

I appreciate all the support from each and every one of you. I am doing better than I was but I am still hopelessly in love with him. I just can't shake the feeling that he is "the one" for me. I know that that probably scares him but I am willing to give him all the time that he needs to be sure about me. I can understand that settling down with a person could be very overwhelming when that person isn't quite sure what they want out of life just yet. I will give him all the time in the world if need be. I also know that some people do not have the greatest opinion of him. That's ok as well. How they see him is different from how I see him. He is, overall, everything that I've wanted in a guy. We all have our ups and downs, all have our own battles to fight (sometimes with even ourselves), are not always understood by everyone, and not always realize what we need/want out of life to ensure our happiness. I've learned some things from this relationship. Some might not sound very good but here's what I've learned:

1. It's ok to be somewhat selfish. You gotta find what makes you happy and stick with it.
2. Compromise should not come from just one side.
3. Speaking your mind can be good or bad but the truth is always the best option.
4. Sometimes, hope is the only thing we have and it is worth keeping whether things pan out or not.
5. When you are really in love, you'll know it and not want to let go of it.
6. The small things in life really do matter just as much as the bigger things.
7. Doubt can be a murderer.
8. A lot can be said in a smile and even more can be said in tears.
9. Anything worth putting your heart into is worth fighting for.
10. Obsession only leads to more insecurity and worry.
11. Worry will not make you live any longer.

Very very insightful. Some people spend tons of money seeing a professional of one sort or the other, and you just gave advice that equals the wisdom one could gain from the pros. Time will heal and you will be the better person for this experience! :hug:

AV, any guy would be lucky have you as his girl. Hopefully your man figures out everything he needs to and is able to come back to you.

I have faith that he will figure out what his heart really wants. He may not know it now, but he will see himself through my eyes in time. I have no doubts of that because so many people love him as he is. The world is his....all he has to do is reach out and seize it. He has a lot to be proud of yet he doesn't see things that way. He has my heart and my belief in him.